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Alas, so I did not get around to actually leaving my house and going shopping today. Instead I moped around for a bit, did some yard work, downloaded all the oc mixes, caught myself up on the tonight show with Conan O'Brien, and managed to avoid doing homework at all costs. Really, I surprise my self through the way in which I manage to go above and beyond my own personal expectations.

Whenever I read or hear the word "alas" I always associate the word with wisdom and intelligence sort of. Which isn't at all why I used it, but seeing it there on the computer screen reminded me. I think it's because (and this is where I get completely nerdy) I always think of Dumbledore when I see the word. Once again, for no real reason.. it's just kind of a strange mental word association. I don't really understand myself at times.

Presently, I'm sitting here in the dark in my room trying to give the impression of sleeping. I don't know why, but with only the glow of the computer screen in front of me, while in my room in the dark feels really personal and comfortable to me. A kind of questionable feeling, but I dunno.. I like it.

Music playing presently is Skyscrapers by OK GO. It's mellow, "chill" even, and calming - not really overly up beat and preppy like most their stuff is, which is why I like it so much. Actually, I really love music in general. I kind of wish I had this exquisite and wonderful music taste, but I know I like so much garbage pop-crap.. like KATY PERRY for example. I HATE to no end that I like some of her music, not the "I kissed a girl" "Ur so gay" or whatever music.. but her quiter songs that definitely aren't going to get radio play. She really is a complete attention whore and I really can't stand admitting I can actually like her music, but I'm just throwing it out there. This is a blog, I'm supposed to get personal.

Speaking of personal! Em was over today (hi, lovey!) which was truly splendid. Sometimes when I'm just with my family, I forget how much I actually love and crave for human interaction. I'm at the completely typical adolescent stage where I'm oftentimes just completely infuriated by my family for reasons that are ultimately completely selfish, I know, I know. But I love being completely alone when I'm at home, which can make me forget how much I can love spending time with people. Right, though, we spent the entire time talking and listening to music and things were just lovely. We decided we're actually going to see one another a lot this summer.. like we've been planning for the last three summers, I think. But I'm pretty sure we're going to keep it this time, we've got a pact/contract to maintain!

Just going back to the parent thing for a bit.. I kind of have this theory. The reason that teens, me included, kind of go through this rebellious, against their parents thing is when we realize that our parents aren't always right. When you realize that they can be completely wrong when they're yelling at you, and they can be completely unfair, and you realize they're not perfect - nowhere near in fact. And actually, soon these people that you've always thought of as complete superiors are put into a position where you're more of equals, and it's this realization that kind of triggers this thing. (Or atleast this is how it has gone for me) Where you realize their imperfections and you kind of hate them for it, not real hate just immense dislike.. well, regardless though, I think once you realize this you kind of want to reject them, and prove you can be better than that. However, when we grow up I think for the most part we realize that everyone we look up to like that is flawed, and grow to re-accept them again. Well, I don't know. That's been floating around in my head for awhile, and I think it's why I think the way I do.

Alright, think I'm good for now. I suppose it's time to say good night, though chances are I won't be in bed for another few others. Got a lot to do tomorrow that I don't particularly feel like doing, which is actually making me debate faking sick. Kind of childish, I know, but I guess I can only get away with it for so long, so why not use the sick card as much as I can, while I can?

Night.
xx