?

I wish I had something good to say instead of merely existing as this empty being without thoughts and distinctions between being the highs and lows of life. Anything and everything that should make me happy is nothing and I'm nothing more than exhausted by nearly all that surrounds me. I'm so sick of this never ending pattern of working my ass off, and finding that the only products of my efforts are nothing more than numbers on a page - hypothetical values that label me as better or worse than someone else.

I'm boring myself and can't seem to understand why everything just can't STOP.

(By the way, picture comes from "2009 A Year in Photo"s: http://www.boston.com/bigpicture/2009/12/2009_in_photos_part_1_of_3.html The entire series makes me overwhelmingly sad, and that's certainty not out of any early case of nostalgia.)